• Louise Southam

Is your own energy ‘destructive’ on the people around you?

I reflected on a recent call I had with a fellow coach, we are both positive, energetic individuals who talk animatedly about the work we do and the difference we make. Yet I found myself feeling very ‘flat’ on the last call I had with him. We started in the usual way, we checked in with how each was doing in our worlds and we shared our upcoming work ventures, yet this time I felt totally drained at the end of our call and in need of recovery time and an energy boost. Why?

I realise what had happened, although our energies where high, our energy frequency was at a different level, so one cancelled out the other. If we were at the same frequency, then we would have had a ‘surge’ of energy and the call would have ended with us both feeling on a metaphorical ‘energy high’.

In physics, this is described as constructive or destructive interference. Another way of explaining this is if you were to drop two pebbles into a pool of water at exactly the same time, at the point their waves meet, it would create a much bigger wave (constructive), yet if you were to drop them at slightly different times, at the point their individual waves meet, one would completely cancel out the other (destructive). The same is true of how our own mood affects the energy of the people around us. This is exactly what happened on my call.

How often in the workplace do we witness this destructive interference? When a leader’s energy is out of alignment with that of their team, not only does it affect the mood of the team around them, it affects the bottom line. Yet time and time again, we bear witness to leaders who behave in a way that drains the energy of the people around them without them realising it. I recall my days in the HR corporate world, where as a team we would have brain storming sessions, all arriving full of energy and ideas, yet the leader thought he was being motivating with his booming voice and his ‘suggestions ’, totally unaware of the impact this hijacking had on our energy. He didn’t even notice that his so-called enthusiasm had wiped out the enthusiasm of each team member. All the body language clues ignored; the slouched postures, the dipped heads, the flushed cheeks, all signs that destructive interference had taken hold. The result of these meetings was each trailing out one by one, demotivated, unheard and totally drained.

So I ask you, are you noticing your energy and the impact it has on the people around you? Are your pebbles dropping at the same time or are you out of alignment with your team? Match your energy with theirs and watch the big wave of energy construct and notice how much easier it is to drive engagement and performance just by becoming more aware. It sounds simple, it can be!

The leadership work that I do with my clients is around increasing their innate charisma, energy being a key part, so that they operate at a higher frequency and have a positive impact on the people around them, which ultimately drives engagement and creates higher performing teams.

Harvard Business School cites, charismatic leaders are 68% more effective as well as happier and healthier.

The Charisma Connection is hosting a FREE taster session on leadership and engagement on 27th March in London. This is a very unique approach to building engagement and incorporates neuroscience, cellular biology, quantum mechanics, subtle energy and behaviours. It is the secret of engagement.

If you are interested in finding out about the day please go to

#leadership #Charisma #engagement

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